How are these people drawn to me? Why do I attract the same kind of people? Why do the same things keep happening to me? Seems like all men/women are the same.
Do you say these line a lot? There might be reason for that. I myself found that I was attracting the same people. I married a narcissist. I dated one. I was best friends with one for six years. Turns out narcissist have a type too. They are attracted to certain qualities. I was defined by many of these qualities. I had to change my way of thinking, looking at the world, and what I was attracted to. I decided I wanted different. Now I have different.
These qualities don’t mean what is happening to you is your fault. It just means you have to be more careful and guarded with yourself. A narcissist will destroy you and completely devalue you. They will try to make themselves the center of your whole world. Never lose your world to one of these individuals. They will cost you yourself and that is price is just to high.
If you possess the qualities you might be a narcissist magnet:
- Low Self Esteem
- Lack of Boundaries
- Fairy Tale Thinkers
- Fear of Being Alone
- Negative Self Talk
- Abused in Childhood
- Adult Children of Alcoholics
- No Support System
- Not Enough Syndrome
- Fixers/White Knight Syndrome
- Self Sacrifices
Those words used to be the exact definition of who I once was. If you fit these words it might be time to change the way you think. You can work on your low self esteem, codependency, start enjoying being alone, use positive self talk, be enough for yourself, stop trying to fix everyone, stop sacrificing yourself, and more importantly know how to spot a narcissist.
Now not all situations are the same. There was a study done on domestic abuse where researchers interviewed an abuser in prison who said he doesn’t target women with low self esteems. He targets strong women because it is much more fun to tare them down to nothing. So cases to differ. Strong individuals with strong self worth are also targeted.
Most narcissist graduate to abusers in their relationships.
You can never have a successful relationship with a narcissist.
“A child that’s being abused by its parents doesn’t stop loving its parents, it stops loving itself.” – Unknown